Anti-Resolutions 2009

Another year, another set of resolutions. Last year I posted my anti-resolutions, and I am pleased to report I kept all of them.

This year Dale has posted ten new anti-resolutions, and thrown down the gauntlet to the rest of us.

So here they are, my 10 Anti-Resolutions for 2009:

  1. I will not launch a campaign to have Paul’s Letter to the Town Council included as one of the books of the New Testament.
  2. I will not insist that everyone is merely a pawn in my elaborate games, especially those who object to moving to Queen’s Bishop 7 to block a check during the Mazeratti Defence.
  3. I will not run for political office with a campaign pledge to abolish Tuesday mornings.
  4. I will not decide which team to support in the Superbowl on the basis of who has the nicest hair.
  5. I will not advocate Mentos and Pepsi as an alternative fuel source.
  6. Mathematics has irrational numbers and imaginery numbers. I will not insist they also include wacky or unsettling numbers.
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  8. Iway alsoway illway otnay ypetay inway igpay atinlay.
  9. Contrary to popular belief, the answer is not 42, and I will not use it as the answer to every question I am asked.
  10. As funny as this would be, I will not tell a child that every time a light goes out on a Christmas tree, a fairy dies, and that the only way to bring the fairy back is to clap. Then rig the lights up to The Clapper.
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